First of all, I am not generally speaking that all men find it easy to move on. I’m just basing this blog post on my experiences, given that I am a girl, when it comes to break ups or simply being left by the one you love. I will start off by letting out all the initial thoughts and emotions an individual feels when they just “broke” it off with someone. Then, I’ll try to even it out on both sides:
I wonder how he (whomever pops in your mind), manages to simply not message you after he talks to you about how he is getting confused in the relationship you currently have or just suddenly cut you off and leave without giving the closure you needed. I guess some guys don’t really get the importance of closure to us girls. The moment you start being cold to us or even the slightest change in the way you text (e.i. “Good morning, beautiful :*” to “Good morning”) bothers us already because that gives us the sign that something is wrong. Moreover, I strongly believe in what they call a “woman’s intuition” because most of the time we’re correct about the assumptions we make. So all we ask, is for our partners to be honest with us, even though it may hurt us like hell while they’re saying it. What’s important is that he showed you that he respects you enough to tell the truth and say that the relationship is just not working out for him anymore.
Its normal to experience these kinds of things after the break up like being in denial that the relationships is over, hating him for leaving you, and then ending the every night by making up excuses for him as to why he left you. But my one million dollar (or rather peso, since I’m from the Philippines) is how do guys manage to look happy and unaffected? It’s so unfair to us girl who are a wreck, where we hear one song and all the memories slap us in the face until we cry again. We don’t even bother eating or thinking what clothes we should wear going to school, heck I’ll wear my favorite pajamas if I want too because I won’t have to look good for anyone anymore. We also tend to forget our personal hygiene (what the heck right? why bother brushing your hair when no one’s going to stroke my hair at the back of my ear anyways). When we see them happy, it gives us the idea that they didn’t even feel any regret or sadness after ending the relationship. Yeah, possibility is that they didn’t cause they ended the relationship in the first place but it hurts because for us, it just shows that you didn’t love us enough to be affected by it ending. Because we obviously couldn’t get over it easily.
On the other hand, I know I’m not a guy but in my perspective I believe that guys have a sense of pride so whether or not they’re the ones who ended the relationship, they do not what to let others, especially their guys friends, think that they are weak. I guess it only happens when they all get drunk together where everyone’s saying a bunch of stuff that no one would probably even remember the next day. Nonetheless, guys have this “macho image” they need to keep where they shouldn’t be crying for one girl because there are a lot of fishes in the sea! Although, I have to admit that this “social norm” makes it harder for guys to let out what they really feel. Nowadays, people have grown more open-minded to such issues thus tearing down stereotypes on both males and females which I guess made it easier for guys to breathe.
On the positive side of the way guys cope with break ups kind-of inspires me to do the same. This goes to all girls who recently got off a relationship or girls who have not yet moved on. Let’s try to turn the tables and show that we can also be happy after a break up, well not immediately of course. After we’ve eaten the last tub of ice cream and shed our last tear, let’s be happy because happiness is truly a choice. It doesn’t have to come from or depend on a person, it starts with you. If you have survived throughout the years before you met your ex-partner, then what’s another more living without him? And who knows, you might be able to meet someone better and more deserving of the love you have given to the wrong person.
–Thank you for reading my blog! It means so much to me that you took time to read everything. I hope you enjoyed it or found it interesting to read, if you have any thoughts or opinions feel free to comment them blow. I know the writing style is yet to be improved hehe so thank you for bearing with me 🙂